hey folks. big chapter of my life sorta closed these past few days. my mom had been fighting cancer for a year and passed away 2 weeks ago, and today was the memorial.

there were points of indescribable sorrow as her condition progressed, but also moments of joy and relief as we spent our last year together and was able to witness how our relationship had changed now that i've grown up. so many other parts of my life taking huge detours to make space for this, yet no regrets at all coming home.

at this point, even though i'm numb to a lot of emotions, i am still so so grateful to have had a wonderful mom who cared for me and our family so much. i am grateful i could be with her one last time after so much separation during college, work, and covid. that i could be helpful and there for her and the rest of my family.

this is a piece i wrote for her birthday in 2016. it's not a ton musically, but it has a bit of bittersweetness to it. arctic cradle was also the first full song i was able to complete since we first found out about her condition and is vaguely in her tribute... i was overjoyed how much she liked the song, she probably played it over a hundred times. in any case, maybe one day i'll find a way with music to honour her again. rest in peace mom.